Start with Gentoo or Arch
I wouldn’t recommend arch to general users. I consider myself a general linux user, and figuring out Arch, even after the installation hurdle, wasn’t easy for me.
is like fixing windows when it doesn’t
I don’t think Arch really makes that easy. Although, I guess archwiki is pretty great. Even arch forum helped me a lot with respect to other disto.
Honestly, I think the issue is still relevant because many users coming to fedi, don’t get exposed to this kind of discussion. I wasn’t. I was bored with mastodon so looked around and found firefish. But my instance was shutting down. So I decided to just use the source of all the *key software, misskey and went to sign up for misskey.io but couldn’t. I had to search a lot to finally figure out the situation. Later, I joined a smaller instance, instead of the flagship instance. My server admin is amazing. They run an instance that also follows US specific laws as well despite being primarily Japanese server because there are a few english users.
What I learned all of these is that, mastodon is not fedi, there are a lot of software, look around before you settle down. And instances with small number of users form a better community. So, you don’t have to choose the largest instance out there.