Okay, I feel like this needs to be addressed as well: this, like, public self-flagellation is not useful either. I have never once been ashamed of being a man.
The problem that men have here is cultural and systemic, it’s expressed with statistics and social norms—it really, really has nothing to do with you or me specifically.
If you’ve already done the work of recognizing that negging women is extremely rude, then you’ve already improved as a person. There’s no reason to be self-loathing about it.
Oh, hold on, I am absolutely not against bullying these people mercilessly. I’m probably meaner to them than you are, if I were just guessing.
The thing that I don’t want people to do is treat a cultural critique as if it were a personal one. A lot of the pushback that you’ll see from the fragile male types is just manifested insecurity over the fact that they think they can’t go up and talk to a woman without her splashing her drink in their face. The critique is just describing the currents of the ocean, but they will treat it as if it were a personal attack because what you’re really arguing with is their hurt feelings.
Okay, I feel like this needs to be addressed as well: this, like, public self-flagellation is not useful either. I have never once been ashamed of being a man.
The problem that men have here is cultural and systemic, it’s expressed with statistics and social norms—it really, really has nothing to do with you or me specifically.
If you’ve already done the work of recognizing that negging women is extremely rude, then you’ve already improved as a person. There’s no reason to be self-loathing about it.
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Oh, hold on, I am absolutely not against bullying these people mercilessly. I’m probably meaner to them than you are, if I were just guessing.
The thing that I don’t want people to do is treat a cultural critique as if it were a personal one. A lot of the pushback that you’ll see from the fragile male types is just manifested insecurity over the fact that they think they can’t go up and talk to a woman without her splashing her drink in their face. The critique is just describing the currents of the ocean, but they will treat it as if it were a personal attack because what you’re really arguing with is their hurt feelings.
deleted by creator